Why

Writers note:  This one has taken me a while to put fingers to keys (a digital equivalent of pen to paper), so I am happy to say that I have already begun some steps to remedy the situation.  I will expound on these a little later.

Why?  This is a question that haunts, but is always a great one to ask.  I did an entire teaching at church on this one.  In this post I want to ask a very particular why.  That is why do I find it so hard to live my "religion" in the confines of my home?  With my beloved partner and family?  Why do I find it hard to pray with them and read scripture.  Why?

Here's the thing, I know that it would benefit my wife in particular.  I know that if we pray together and for each other that it would help us, and it would be beneficial to her.  I would do almost anything for her.  I would die for her, heck I would probably kill for her if it was necessary.  So, why is this one thing so hard for me.

There is always the typical answers of life being busy, the hectic everyday stuff and wanting to wind down at the end of the day.  Having four monkeys aged 2, 3, 4, and 5 will do that to you, but I think this is a bit of a cop-out.  I can always find time to watch football, or do homework (lesson prep or marking).  Computer games have no troubles getting done (thanks Hearthstone).

Anyway, whatever the answer to the question why, I need to make sure to satisfy the spiritual needs of my wife as well as the physical ones (that's what she said).

So why do I write this down?  Well I guess for a couple of reasons.
1.  To let everyone out there that I do not have it all together.
2.  This actually makes me a little more accountable by writing it out.
3.  Maybe just maybe someone else out there feels the same as I do, and we could find some solutions together.

So, at the beginning I mentioned that I have already put into place some steps to remedy.  I must admit they are only baby steps, but baby steps are better than no steps.

I have made sure to actually read my own devotional and the bible everyday.  I know that this doesn't directly apply to what I am talking about here, but I can't really be helpful nourishing someone else if I am starving.  I have been off on summer break, and not having the routine of work always makes it difficult for me to keep up with this.

We also have started praying for someone not in our immediate family at supper before we say grace.  So far we've done two grandma's, and uncle Alex.  Making this routine is something that I feel is a great example for our children.

I love my wife, and wish I could be the man that God made me to be for her.

Who do you say I am?

I have had some conversations with people about "religious" things, and the one thing that gets said that I think annoys me the most is "Pastor said ..."  Maybe it's not Pastor, maybe it's CS Lewis, or Francis of Assisi, or insert any other "famous", or "learned" name in.

Now, it's not that we shouldn't try to learn from others and it's not that there is no authority in what these people say, the problem I have is that they are people.  People are not perfect, people are sometimes wrong, and frankly I don't care what people say nearly as much as what God says.

The biggest reason why I have a problem with "Pastor says...", is that when it comes down to it and you stand before the throne, it won't matter one bit what your pastor, or CS Lewis, or any other person says about God.  What will matter is the answer to the question "Who do you say I am?"  That is what do YOU believe?

So, here is a small essay that I wrote as a teen about what I believe.  It's interesting looking back now at what I wrote.  I will reproduce it exactly, including some spelling mistakes.  Oh, and there is one swear word...

What I Believe

Here is what I believe, kinda a statement of faith for me.  This is just me hashing out what it is that I believe, in no particular order.

I believe that there is one true God, that He had His son die so I might live.  I believe that He sends His Holy Spirit to comfort and heal us.  I believe that God loves me and wants good things for me.  I believe that God is in control of everything, my finances, my love life, or lack thereof, and my future.  I believe that miracles do happen today, I have seen them.  I believe that I will be married one day and that God will bless that marriage.  I believe that the Bible is the flawless, holy word of God.  I believe that God can and will speak to his people, even though I have never really experienced it myself.  I believe that being a pastor is hard work and a job that I do not want.  I believe God will never and has never and can never fail us, when it appears as though he has, we don't know all the facts.  I believe that things do work out in the end for those who love God.  I believe that there is power in the spoken word, and that for many thoughts to achieve there full potential, they must be said out loud.  I believe that it is not a crime to open a door or push in a chair for a woman.  I believe that worship is a gift from God that should be fun and at the same time approached with reverence.  It's quite the privilege.  I believe in helping when I can, and making time to be there for a friend.  I believe in the sanctity of marriage, to paraphrase:  What God has joined let no man tear apart.  I believe God has a plan for my life, and that although I may fell like a little guy in the grand scheme of things, with God's help little guys can do big things too.  I believe that being considerate to others is not a bad thing, and that being taken advantage of is a risk you take when you treat others the way that you should.  I believe that abortion is murder.  I believe that homosexuality is wrong, even if that makes me a homophobe.  I believe that sex outside of wedlock is just as wrong, but gets overlooked by Christians for the most part.  I believe that wrestling is real (just kidding).  I believe that people take themselves far too seriously, and that Christians could use a little more humour in their lives and could laugh at themselves a little more often.  I believe that God has a great sense of humour, just look at what He's made and what He's got us doing...  I believe that God made us each and every one in His likeness, not that of an ape, orang-utan, or chimpanzee.  I believe that math is fun.  I believe that sometimes bad things happen to good people for what appears to be no good reason.  Shit happens.  I believe that swearing won't send you to hell.  I believe that you should be careful what you say.  Words can hurt.

So that is what I believed as a teen.  It's interesting looking back, now that I am 37 and seeing how some things worked out.

So, I ask you "What do you believe?"

The Big Three

So I'm sitting in church the other day and I notice that the pastor has mentioned the same three sins again.  I call them the big three.  His choices:  drinking, smoking and pornography.  First, I do want to say that smoking as far as I can tell isn't a sin.  I think it is a stupid life choice, but not a sin.  He doesn't mean drinking altogether, but drinking in excess.

I start thinking about the big three.  I don't smoke, I can probably count on my fingers the number of drinks I had all last year, and I am at a point in my life where pornography does not have a hold on me (thank God I can say that, it wasn't always the case, and maybe I'll write about that sometime).  So, does that mean that I have it all together?

The simple answer is no.  The biggest problem with the big three idea is that I think it can give people a false sense of comfort.  I think of the parable of the pharisee and the tax collector:

Luke 18

9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

14 “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

So often we look at the pharisee (or any other character in the bible that failed in some way) and see them as something separate from ourselves, almost as if they are some alien species.  How could they possibly be so stupid?!  They missed the whole point.  The irony here is that in so doing we are the pharisee.

How does this make a difference in my life?  Well I was walking the dog the other day, and praying as I went (thanks Andy for that idea!).  I think God spoke to me about my big three.  

1.  Acting out of frustration:  I have four children aged 4, 3, almost 2 and 7 months.  I love them and wouldn't trade what I have for anything.  Sometimes dealing with them can be very frustrating.  I have been learning with God's help to not react when frustrated.  It hasn't been easy or flawless, but it has been amazing.

2.  Not treating God's name as holy:  Again on a walk with the dog I started to paraphrase the Lord's prayer.  "God my father in heaven, Your name is holy..."  Here I stopped.  I don't always treat it that way.  There have been times when I treat his name as a throwaway...  I am not one who freaks out over every word, but the way we speak matters.

3.  Judgementalism:  I have noticed recently that I have walked into certain situations with a poor attitude.  I think that the person can't do this as well as I could.  Why are they even there?  Wait, does God use the humble for noble purposes?  Hmmm.

Anyway, that is my big three.  I mention them not out of false humility so people tell me how awesome I am (I am pretty awesome), but to remind everyone that your big three and mine may not be the same, and that if you don't drink, smoke, or indulge in pornography, you can still find areas for God to work in your life.

1 + 1 = 2

Deuteronomy 4:

9 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. 10 Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.”

Here is the true failure of the Israelites and, I believe, many of today's Christians.  Many of us make life choices so that our children "Won't have to go through what I did."  We remember times when our families struggled to put food on the table, or pay the car insurance, or get money to go on that school trip.  We choose our path to make life better for our children.  This is a good thing, but it is a little short sighted.

Mark 8:36

What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?

Yet, I hear parents "brag" about their children.  "I never tried to influence little Jimmy spiritually.  I prefer that he comes to his own understanding."  To me, this makes NO SENSE!!!  I am a math teacher and as such many times I look to numbers for answers.  I would never let my son or daughter decide whether they believed that 1 + 1 = 2.  I would never let them come to their own understanding.  Some things are true, and some things are not.  I teach my children what is true and I discourage them from believing what is false.

Look, if religion to you is only a way of life, and a moral code, something to make you feel good about yourself, then go ahead let your kids "find their way".  If however, it is about the search for TRUTH, real life changing truth, then how could you let them go their own way?  Imagine you lived in a cabin with two doors.  Outside one door was a meadow with fruit trees and sunshine and lollipops.  Outside the other was a chasm of doom.  Your child has to choose a door and walk through it blindfolded.  If you know which door leads to the beautiful meadow, do you tell them?

So, here is what I am doing and what I intend to do:

1. Live my "religion" every day in a way that my kids can see that it is real to me
2. Teach my children the truth about Christ
3. Tell my children stories about how God intervened in my life and how he intervened in theirs
4. Encourage them to follow a path that is Godly

Children are the greatest gift that we were given.  We have to keep them safe and show them the way.  The world doesn't leave anything to chance.  Anyone that has an agenda to promote goes to the children first.  It is important for us to equip them to fight the lies that are out there, and not leave them wandering blind in a world that will take advantage of an empty mind.

Generations to Come

So, the last time we visited with the Israelites, we read the following passage:

Numbers 14
26 The Lord said to Moses and Aaron: 27 “How long will this wicked community grumble against me? I have heard the complaints of these grumbling Israelites. 28 So tell them, ‘As surely as I live, declares the Lord, I will do to you the very thing I heard you say: 29 In this wilderness your bodies will fall—every one of you twenty years old or more who was counted in the census and who has grumbled against me. 30 Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. 31 As for your children that you said would be taken as plunder, I will bring them in to enjoy the land you have rejected. 32 But as for you, your bodies will fall in this wilderness. 33 Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the wilderness. 34 For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you.’ 35 I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this wilderness; here they will die.”

First, can you imagine being the guy that just had his twentieth birthday the day before this.  Seriously, that would suck.  If only I was a day younger...

Anyway, Israel has been told that they don't get to see the promised land after all.  Only the young will get to go.  I guess that I would hope that Israel had learned her lesson, and would rely on God from now on, but...

Numbers 21

4 They traveled from Mount Hor along the route to the Red Sea,[c] to go around Edom. But the people grew impatient on the way; 5 they spoke against God and against Moses, and said, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? There is no bread! There is no water! And we detest this miserable food!”

6 Then the Lord sent venomous snakes among them; they bit the people and many Israelites died. 7 The people came to Moses and said, “We sinned when we spoke against the Lord and against you. Pray that the Lord will take the snakes away from us.” So Moses prayed for the people.

8 The Lord said to Moses, “Make a snake and put it up on a pole; anyone who is bitten can look at it and live.” 9 So Moses made a bronze snake and put it up on a pole. Then when anyone was bitten by a snake and looked at the bronze snake, they lived.

and 

Number 25 
While Israel was staying in Shittim, the men began to indulge in sexual immorality with Moabite women, 2 who invited them to the sacrifices to their gods. The people ate the sacrificial meal and bowed down before these gods. 3 So Israel yoked themselves to the Baal of Peor. And the Lord’s anger burned against them.

4 The Lord said to Moses, “Take all the leaders of these people, kill them and expose them in broad daylight before the Lord, so that the Lord’s fierce anger may turn away from Israel.”

5 So Moses said to Israel’s judges, “Each of you must put to death those of your people who have yoked themselves to the Baal of Peor.”

You see Israel did not do a good job of reminding the younger generations about what God had done.  They forgot God because they did not heed God's warning in Deuteronomy 4:

9 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. 10 Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.” 11 You came near and stood at the foot of the mountain while it blazed with fire to the very heavens, with black clouds and deep darkness. 12 Then the Lord spoke to you out of the fire. You heard the sound of words but saw no form; there was only a voice.13 He declared to you his covenant, the Ten Commandments, which he commanded you to follow and then wrote them on two stone tablets. 14 And the Lord directed me at that time to teach you the decrees and laws you are to follow in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess.

This I think is the real failure of the Israelites.  They failed their children, and their children's children, etc.  Can you imagine how the history of Israel would have changed if they had started with what God had told them, to teach their children.

Finger Pointing

When last we met we looked at an overview of the Israelites journey out of Egypt and on to the Promised Land.  Time and time again we noticed that God rescued His chosen people, only to have them turn their backs on Him, and forget all He did for them.  If you are anything like me, you were probably wondering how the Israelites could be so stinkin' STUPID!?!?  It's an easy thing to do.  We read the stories of the bible, knowing full well how the story ends, and look down on the people (Israel, the Pharisees, doubting Thomas), when the truth is, if we are truly honest with ourselves, we will admit that we are no better than they were.

I bring to your attention a "funny" story.  A while ago I had to purchase a power supply for my laptop.  I bought it at Best Buy (it was on my way home from work, and kind of an emergency buy).  Anyway, after a a while, for reasons I don't remember, it stopped working.  Crap.  It was still under warantee, YAY!  I knew that I had to have the receipt somewhere, but where?  I couldn't find it anywhere.  I looked all over the house.  I phoned Best Buy, after some time on the phone, they basically told me there was nothing they could do, and that I would have to call the credit card company.  I called them, and they told me that there was nothing they could do and I would have to call Best Buy.  Anyway, after approximately 3 hours on the phone (that is not an exaggeration) Best Buy came through for me with a copy of the receipt!  YAY!

Why do I tell you this story.  Well not long after this day, I looked in my wallet.  There was the original receipt.  It was in my pocket all along!!  I never even considered praying about it.  I forgot that God could, or would be a part of my life.  This is where I give kudos to Beth.  The first thing she asks when I mention that I lost something is "Did you pray about it?"  I relied on my own strength and understanding.  I won in the end, but not without much struggle and frustration.  Sound familiar?  Pick a story from the Israelites...

Here's another story to show my point.  I am a man of routine.  If I stray from the routine, all Hell beaks loose.  I forget to bring my lunch to work if I add something to my morning routine for example.  I tend to spend time reading the bible while I eat my breakfast in the morning.  I used to read at night before bed, but found that I couldn't concentrate when I was tired.  Anyway, this works great during the school year, but during the summer, my schedule gets all messed up (I teach math at a High school).  There are often multiple days in a row where I just don't read my bible.  Now, I have noticed a change when this happens.  Usually I don't remember my dreams, and very rarely do I have bad dreams, but during the times when I am not reading the bible consistently, I have dreams that I don't want to remember.  I'm not trying to say that reading the bible is some magic pill that protects your dreams.  I am saying that spending time with God has benefits, and forgetting Him will have negative consequences.

So the moral of the story is, not to point fingers at the faults and failures of the people in the bible, but to try to learn from them.  Oh, and don't forget God!

Israelites

So, my inspiration for this was the Israelites.  I spent some time going through their story.  I'd like to give you an overview of the beginning of their experience from life in Egypt to wandering the desert.

Okay, Israel has been enslaved.  Life sucks.  They need God to help them.  Thing is, it seems that they have forgotten who The Lord is.  I'll get to that later, let's go back to Egypt.  So Pharaoh tries to kill all the Hebrew boys, but the Lord has favour on Israel and he doesn't succeed.  He keeps trying to stop them from increasing, but nothing seems to work, so harsh labour and poor conditions await the Hebrews.

Then comes Moses, the burning bush and all that good stuff.  Wow this really is a MAN OF GOD!!!  You would think they would be impressed right?  Well not really.  Moses tells Pharaoh to let his people go or there would be bad stuff going down.  The first few signs (stick changes to a snake, water to blood, frogs everywhere) are replicated by the pharaoh's magicians.  Then come the others (gnats, flies, death of livestock, boils, hail, locusts, darkness, death of firstborn).  These could not be replicated by the magicians.  Many of them, including the worst ones, only effected the Egyptians.

At this point I'm thinking that if I'm Pharaoh, I beg for forgiveness and give Israel all they want.  I think that if I'm an Israelite, I follow God anywhere.  Read the story, it's not what happens.  First God doesn't tell the Israelites to take the most direct route, instead God lead them away from philistine territory because “If they face war, they might change their minds and return to Egypt.”  He knew the kind of people he was dealing with.

He lead them with a cloud by day and a pillar of fire at night.  Again, I'm thinking that's pretty cool, I'll follow wherever you want...  Again, not what happens.  They get to the Red Sea and the first thing they think is that they will die!?  Really?  How's that again?  Anyway, instead of going back to Egypt, God saves them and brings them across on dry land.

I could go on and on about how God delivers the Israelites just to see them rebel, ask to go back to Egypt, make a golden calf etc.  Still He provides water to drink in the desert, food to eat (manna and quail) and protects them throughout their trip.

Finally, the last straw for this group, they hear a report about the land they are to take possession of.  The people are giants, they will never be able to beat them.  They get scared and surprise, surprise, they want to go back to Egypt, except for Caleb and Joshua.

From Numbers 14:

The Lord replied, “I have forgiven them, as you asked. ²¹ Nevertheless, as surely as I live and as surely as the glory of the Lord fills the whole earth, ²² not one of those who saw my glory and the signs I performed in Egypt and in the wilderness but who disobeyed me and tested me ten times— ²³ not one of them will ever see the land I promised on oath to their ancestors. No one who has treated me with contempt will ever see it. ²⁴ But because my servant Caleb has a different spirit and follows me wholeheartedly, I will bring him into the land he went to, and his descendants will inherit it. ²⁵ Since the Amalekites and the Canaanites are living in the valleys, turn back tomorrow and set out toward the desert along the route to the Red Sea.

Then, 

‘As surely as I live, declares the Lord, I will do to you the very thing I heard you say: ²⁹ In this wilderness your bodies will fall—every one of you twenty years old or more who was counted in the census and who has grumbled against me. ³⁰ Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. ³¹ As for your children that you said would be taken as plunder, I will bring them in to enjoy the land you have rejected. ³² But as for you, your bodies will fall in this wilderness. ³³ Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the wilderness. ³⁴ For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you.’ ³⁵ I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this wilderness; here they will die.

The Israelites forgot God, and they suffered because of it.  Over and over and over again.

Next time:  What about when I forget God...