Why

Writers note:  This one has taken me a while to put fingers to keys (a digital equivalent of pen to paper), so I am happy to say that I have already begun some steps to remedy the situation.  I will expound on these a little later.

Why?  This is a question that haunts, but is always a great one to ask.  I did an entire teaching at church on this one.  In this post I want to ask a very particular why.  That is why do I find it so hard to live my "religion" in the confines of my home?  With my beloved partner and family?  Why do I find it hard to pray with them and read scripture.  Why?

Here's the thing, I know that it would benefit my wife in particular.  I know that if we pray together and for each other that it would help us, and it would be beneficial to her.  I would do almost anything for her.  I would die for her, heck I would probably kill for her if it was necessary.  So, why is this one thing so hard for me.

There is always the typical answers of life being busy, the hectic everyday stuff and wanting to wind down at the end of the day.  Having four monkeys aged 2, 3, 4, and 5 will do that to you, but I think this is a bit of a cop-out.  I can always find time to watch football, or do homework (lesson prep or marking).  Computer games have no troubles getting done (thanks Hearthstone).

Anyway, whatever the answer to the question why, I need to make sure to satisfy the spiritual needs of my wife as well as the physical ones (that's what she said).

So why do I write this down?  Well I guess for a couple of reasons.
1.  To let everyone out there that I do not have it all together.
2.  This actually makes me a little more accountable by writing it out.
3.  Maybe just maybe someone else out there feels the same as I do, and we could find some solutions together.

So, at the beginning I mentioned that I have already put into place some steps to remedy.  I must admit they are only baby steps, but baby steps are better than no steps.

I have made sure to actually read my own devotional and the bible everyday.  I know that this doesn't directly apply to what I am talking about here, but I can't really be helpful nourishing someone else if I am starving.  I have been off on summer break, and not having the routine of work always makes it difficult for me to keep up with this.

We also have started praying for someone not in our immediate family at supper before we say grace.  So far we've done two grandma's, and uncle Alex.  Making this routine is something that I feel is a great example for our children.

I love my wife, and wish I could be the man that God made me to be for her.